Last week on Project Runway, Tim Gunn used his patented Tim Gunn Rescue™ to save Justin from elimination. This means we still have three dozen or so designers left. They assemble themselves before their spirit guide, Heidi Klum, who sends them to nirvana—the Marie Claire shoe closet. Ooh! Ahh! It is filled with joy, happiness, and heels higher than a Real Housewife on a bender. The challenge is to create a look inspired by a pair of shoes. But, the designers only get to choose their shoes if they get one question correct on a fashion history quiz. The last two shoe-less designers are Dom and Miranda, who apparently know nothing about the industry in which they work and, as punishment, are stuck with a pair of flats.
Miranda sketches a clown outfit with red plaid pants to go with her red shoes, and Alexander sketches the same exact thing, only marginally more elegant. Back at the workroom, Alexander realizes that they are both designing plaid pants, so it’s going to be a pants-off on the runway. Alexandria has “bondage slash gladiator” shoes that require a short-short dress so we may hear Nina say the word “vagina” again. Dom is working with bright colors which is either refreshing or crazy, and Bradon is cable stitching a sweater out of chiffon in case Bill Cosby goes to lunch with the remaining Golden Girl.
Tim visits the workroom and calls Justin’s colors too color-coded. He thinks Miranda’s fabric choice looks inexpensive, he calls Ken’s pouf coat dress dated, Ken calls Bradon’s dress appropriate for “my great-great grandmother’s casket,” Karen has a matchy-matchy problem, and Helen is creating a pretty but simple black dress and cape.
Sewing, cutting, hemming, measuring, and Alexander accuses Miranda’s plaid paints of being ugly while Ken calls them “Amy Winehouse after she ODed.”
And it’s time for the runway! The judges are Zac Posen, Nina Garcia, Kaley Cuoco from The Big Bang Theory, and Nina’s boss, Anne Fulenwider.
Ken’s black dress is short and sassy.
Alexander’s plaid pants and asymmetrical top is killer.
Miranda’s plaid pants and white top are not as good as Alexander’s look.
Dom’s bright color blocked dress is not flattering.
Justin’s black pants suit looks like an outfit for a villainess.
Alexandria’s black dress is a little plain, but what else are you supposed to do with thigh-high gladiator boots?
Karen’s suit is surprisingly chic, but the jacket is too frumpy.
Bradon’s cocktail dress would look great on the mother of the bar mitzvah boy.
Kate’s split-front pants are sharp, but the white shirt is not fitting so good.
Jeremy’s woven sweater is sloppy and is going to end up on the sale rack.
Helen’s black dress and cape makes little impact on the runway.
Kate, Karen, Dom, Justin, and Alexander are safe. And that leaves the best and the worst. Heidi loves Alexandria’s dress because she likes the soft with the hard. The other judges note that the shoes are the look, and the dress is the back-up singer. Jeremy’s outfit is called “a bit much,” and Zac says it “verges on trampy.” Helen yammers on about challenging herself to make something tailored, and Nina buys it hook, line, and sinker. All of the ladies want that black dress. Heidi doesn’t like Miranda’s look because the model doesn’t look like a cool girl. Zac likes that he’s getting a “nerd alert” vibe, but thinks the outfit isn’t kooky enough. The judges find Ken’s dress to be sexy and stylish. Bradon’s stinkeroo cocktail dress is “old school” and tortures the fabulous shoes. Zac calls it “frumpy dumpy,” which is kind of perfect.
The judges’ three top looks are all black dresses, but Helen gets the win with her “sophisticated and sharp” dress and cape. Ken, Alexandria, and Jeremy are all in, and Bradon and Miranda are left on the runway. Bradon is in, and Miranda is out in a puddle of tears. Whatever, it’s not like she had a chance of winning anyhow.
Next week an obstacle course, Heidi visits the workroom, and the return of Ms. Michael Kors!
What did you think of this episode’s runway looks?
(all images via Lifetime)
About the Author: Linda Sue Strong is the founder of entertainment blog TerribleTelevision.com and an occasional attorney. Her life has not yet been turned into a reality television show. Follow her at @themisslinda.